I expected to leave feeling suitably angry about these ugly shoes and the fact that their wearers spend £600-plus to totter around in them.
Indeed, I did leave the Mount Street shop feeling sick, empty and in a panic — but not solely for the reason I expected. In fact, I left with a pair of nude shoes embellished with Swarovski crystals, a slim platform and that trademark blood-red sole like a lascivious tongue. They cost me £895.
WAG must-have: Louboutin-shod Coleen Rooney (left) and Victoria Beckham
Off the peg, the concealed platform, which is nearly 4in thick, comes with a 6½ in heel — that’s 1½ in short of Posh’s stratospherically high version.
I find a similar silver pair in store and take them down, telling the sales assistant I want to try on a pair in black patent leather, too.
‘Zat is the only one left,’ he tells me, putting it back carefully. ‘The patent and the satin have sold out.’
I’m always a little bit dubious when high-end brands tell me an item has sold out or has a waiting list. The effect is obvious: we want it simply because we can’t have it.
Dizzy heights: Kim Kardashian, left, and Emma Roberts are also fans of the style, wearing them out in Hollywood last week
But why on earth has such an ugly, extreme form of footwear become so beloved of stars, magazines, WAGS and the likes of you and me who can’t really afford them?
Extreme height: At £635, these Louboutins suggest it's price not taste that matters to the rich
So far this year, the 47-year-old designer is defying the recession. Retail sales exceeded £154 million in 2010. Louboutin says his secret is that he always stocks the classics.
But Mr Louboutin needs to beware. If you make a brand too popular and ubiquitous, allow it to be worn by the super-tanned rather than supermodels, you are in danger of devaluing it.
Remember when Daniella Westbrook was seen dressed head-to-toe in Burberry check? This British brand’s credibility plummeted overnight and it took years of clever marketing, a new creative director and pushing the brand ever more crazily towards so-called ‘luxury’ to leave its less desirable customers floundering.
Ah, but isn’t anyone’s credit card still money in the bank? Not really. A luxury brand cannot shift the real money spinners (cosmetics and perfume) without an almost unattainable top end.
That is why the Louboutin designs have become more extreme and, consequently, prices have sky-rocketed
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